14 posts tagged “funny”

A Funny Thing Happened

Nov 19, 2009
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I woke up with a goal in mind. Today, yes TODAY, I was going to finish up this proposal/research paper that has been hanging over my head like a guillotine. The word limit was 3000-5000 words, and I have had 1300 words (all appendices and the introduction) finished for weeks now. Research is piling up on my desk, with tons of notes and outlines, but I have been sitting behind the biggest writer's block of the century. Add to that a sick baby for a week, meaning she stayed at home with me rather than go to the sitter, and my work time/desire has been shot. Until last night, when I just shook myself and said, "Tomorrow. DO IT TOMORROW."

So, after having a banana and some coffee at my desk this morning, I dove into the material. About 6 hours later I hit "save" on the nice, neatly formatted 3900-odd words and started high-fiving my computer. Seriously, I could have danced some kind of Irish jig if I had any Irish rhythm. Not only did I finish with rough draft, with just minor stuff to add next week after one more interview, but I had another hour and a half at least until Amos and Hazel would be home! WOOOO, SPRING BREAK!!!!!!!

To celebrate I decided to take a shower AND use a sugar scrub. I know, it's like my own private honeymoon with myself! After stepping into the special, awesome, Vera Wang, Amos-gifted robe that I can't wear around a baby, I thought a little apple wine might be nice while I let my hair air-dry. I always let my hair dry for about 20, 30 minutes before using the blow dryer, so why not make that time special when I'm feeling so awesome, right? Right! My good friend Amy gave me two bottles of homemade apple wine last summer, one of which was chilling in the fridge for just such a moment. I poured a glass and settled down at my computer to catch up on all my favorite blogs.

My phone rings from the kitchen. I stand up, stumble into the hallway, and realize two things. First of all, I'm walking down the hall bracing myself on either side with my hands. Secondly, I'm walking like that because I'm drunk. Like, druuuuunk. Drunk-dialing drunk. Mouth open drunk. Bangs are in my eyes and I'm not moving them because I don't see them drunk. Yep. And, being drunk, I think this is pretty funny.

See, I kind of skipped lunch because I was in a writing fury. And I kind of wasn't hungry because I drank 6 cups of not-decaf coffee today after breakfast. Yeaaaaah.

All I can think is that I have GOT to eat and it has to be NOW because if Amos comes home and sees me I am going to be kind of embarrassed. I blow-dry my hair, whipping that machine around (FYI, not all that fun if you're drunk), throw on a flannel, and careen down my crazy steep staircase, hoping to duck into the natural foods store below us and grab some kind of granola to soak up the wine. I bust out onto the sidewalk and hear "It's Mama!!!!" from across the way. I turn in classic slow-motion to see Amos and Hazel waving like adorable maniacs, mouths open and everything. Of course he can tell something's up, and of course he pokes fun at me while we're in Tom's. It's only when we get upstairs, and he sees how little is gone from the bottle, that he actually laughs so hard he has to put Hazel down before he drops her.

The moral of this story is that if you have a cool husband he'll take you out for Mexican so you can sober up at 4 pm.

A Walk in the Park

Nov 8, 2009
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Here are two fun videos to start the week nicely. The first I took right around Halloween, on the 27th I believe. Hazel is so adorable.

14 months - around Halloween

This one is a little older, maybe mid-October. She's just happy when she wakes up from a good nap! Enjoy!

14 months - Crib Dancing

Happy Halloween!

Oct 31, 2009
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Trick or Treat from Liberace (and her parents)!!

Daddy & Liberace

Liberace & Mama, Halloween 2009!

The whole dorky family

Hazel in the Kitchen

Oct 25, 2009
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Y'all know what a good little eater Hazel is, right? Normally I fix her food and hand her the spoon. My job is basically done at that point; she can feed herself until just a smear is left on her plate. She does make some messes, particularly with food falling down onto (and under, somehow) her pants legs, so I get baby girl totally undressed before eating.

Today I got her all set up and turned to wash dishes. I think she was finished before her food was all gone (dinner would be the first time - EVER), and so got bored.

Food Face

There was food all over that baby, and a peculiarly large amount on the floor. Oh, and also that little snack she was saving for later on her shoulder, there.

Later on we were having some water and I thought it might be a great time to take the lid off the sippy cup and let her pick it up herself.

So, she can't use a cup just yet.

Turns out I should not take my advice all the time. :)

Two New iPhone Pictures

Oct 20, 2009
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I took this picture last week; I had to walk over to the store, so I got Hazel all bundled up and we strolled over. After getting outside we realized that it was freezing - in the mid 30's - so we hurried! But this tree was so pretty, and so is my daughter, so we made a quick pit stop.

October_hazel

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This one I took last weekend in the grocery store. She likes to hold the list, and suddenly she stuck it in her mouth and started laughing! She's making all these little jokes on her own, or doing things that we do but not immediately after we do them. What a big girl, huh?

Inthebuggy_oct09

Tickling

Oct 18, 2009
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Another video, taken last week, where I'm tickling Hazel. This was a brief respite in the middle of hell-week, which is my affectionate name for the week(s) she's cutting 2 teeth that refuse to break through the thin tissue of her gums. YAY. But she was happy here, for a bit, and it's adorable.

13 months - Tickling clip

It's a Baby Shower!

Oct 18, 2009
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Not for me, but for our friends Amy and Chris, who own the CSA farm of which we are members. Today we attended their sweet baby shower and had a great time. This is the sweater I worked like a madwoman to finish:

BSJ Gift

They are going to wait and find out the sex when the baby is born, so I thought orange and gold would be perfect and more appealing than pastel colors. I used Knit Picks machine washable sport yarn, which is super squishy soft and great for a baby. They loved it, which made me happy :)

In that the spirit of new parents, I made a video today of what we like to call "Please Take a Nap."

13 months - stair climbing clip

Strawberry Hat

Apr 1, 2009
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I have been wanting to make this hat for a loooooong time, but for some reason never got around to it. I finally sit down with it, and not only is it completely adorable, but it only took me a day to make!!

Hazel in her new hat

And what do you know, I make her a new, cute hat and this is the best she can do for me!! I couldn't get a smile out of her this morning for love or money. Later on we'll try again, maybe she'll be in a better mood. :D

Trying to Escape

Nov 30, 2008
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Hazel was taking a nap yesterday, and after a few minutes of fussing finally settled down. I went in just to check on her and this is what I saw:

Crib Disaster!!

WTF?!?!!!! She was fine! Just smooshed against the bars with her arms and legs hanging out. She just looked at me when I came in, smiled for a second, then just looked away. I almost had a coronary, and she's just pleased as you can be. Since she was ok I HAD to get a picture of this, just had to!

Baby Milestones

Nov 10, 2008
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Hazel is growing up so fast y'all. It is just ridiculous! She is 11 weeks old tomorrow. It seems like she's been here forever and not at all, all at the same time. She can hold up her head fantastically now, even pushing herself up on her arms when she's on her stomach. She's wearing 6 month sized pants because she's so tall, and all her NB sized stuff is just crazy looking on her, if it even still fits on her. She sleeps all night, smiles all the time, and is getting really vocal with cooing and squealing. She also splashes in the tub!! Adorable.

Today we tried out the umbrella stroller for the first time. That's the one, for you kids without kids, that is small and lightweight versus those montrosities with cupholders and shelves you see people wheeling around the mall. We had to wait until she was able to hold up her head very well, and since today I was bored inside and she was fussy if I set her down, we tried it out by walking to the library. I had that kid so bundled up it was hilarious. She had on a long-sleeved onesie, thick double-lined pants, socks, boots, a knit sweater, and a knit hat, plus she was covered with a chenille blanket. She was set, lol! But it was flurrying (is that a word?) when we were out, so I wanted to make sure she was warm. Hazel seemed to love the weather, or at least not mind, because she was quiet the whole time, even all through the library. She fell asleep on the way back, though.